My first day as a Level 4 Adult figure skater – The “Three Turn” provides Three Times the Falling Fun!

Excitement level: Normalthree turns
Rink temperature: Arctic
Number of falls: A baker’s dozen

A whole new level, a whole new class. For me though, this means a new set of suspicious, silent children backed up by displeased, crossed-arm parents. I have my speech ready this time:

  • No, I’m not a parent
  • Yes, I really did mean to sign up for this class
  • Yes, I am aware there is an Adult Class
  • No, I don’t want to take my coat off

We begin skating around in a circle and my heart soars as I hear my instructor praise my technique. Because I am easily 2.5 times taller than any other person in the class, I often need to “lap” the children as we go around the circle. This makes me Enemy #1 for the two boys in my class, who are so desperate not to be lapped by me that they resort to running on top of the ice. They look frantically behind them to see if the monster is still chasing them. I smile and wave. They run harder.

With just ten minutes left to go in class, I am on a skater’s high. I haven’t fallen once. My instructor nods in approval each time I circle her. commentatorsI see myself in an elaborate glittered costume, skating in the next Olympics, hearing the commentators say:

Now Tim, is it unusual to have a 42 year-old woman skating in the Olympics?”

“Well it’s good you brought that up Dick. She is a bit reminiscent of Staraskaya, who skated until she was almost 19.”

A whistle blow brings me back to reality. Why am I at the South Pole? Oh right, it’s just the skating rink. It’s time to learn a new skill, the instructor says. Oh man, this is where it always goes south for me. We’re going to learn the 3-point turn, or as I like to call it, the “#$#%@*&% 3-point turn.” You skate on one skate (ha!) in one direction, then you shift, jump a little bit (ha ha!) and land on the same skate (ha ha ha!) going the opposite direction (it’s not funny anymore).

Not only does practicing this move consist of lots and lots of falling, it throws in the added sparkle of knee-twisting and probably ligament tearing. On one of my frequent trips to the ice, I begin to wonder if maybe it isn’t time to take up golf, or possibly tennis.

Then I landed one. It was heaven. I never want to leave the ice.

(If you missed my previous posts about starting up figure skating as adult, you can start at the beginning here: My First Day as an Adult Figure Skater.)

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5 Comments

  1. Is there a level 5? I must hear more!

    and wait what? You jump during a 3-turn? What kind of madness is this?

    Reply
  2. Hey! I took up bodybuilding at 42 years old, so you’re not alone in your craziness! I actually took up the sport because someone told me I was too old to compete. That got me mad! Of course, I had the last laugh when I won my first trophy. So, don’t give up! In the long run, you’ll be glad you stuck with it 🙂

    Reply
    • Picky Eater

       /  February 5, 2013

      Thanks for the encouragement JoJo! You’ve got some great stuff on your blog – can’t wait to see more.

      Reply
  3. Picky Eater

     /  February 4, 2013

    Yes! That will totally be me!
    (Well, that, or I’ll be the person in the giant bear costume…)

    Reply
  4. Cindy Cutsforth

     /  February 4, 2013

    [cid:image001.jpg@01CE02D4.248B14E0]

    Could this pose be in your future?? Another entertaining installment in your quest to get hired by the Ice Capades. ☺

    Cindy Cutsforth, CHIE
    Commercial Claims Manager
    PacificSource Health Plans
    541.684.5243
    541.686.1242 Ext. 5243
    FAX:

    Reply

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